December 16, 2006

Long Dog

I'm a Lurcher so I'm a SIGHT Hound. I'm a very good HEARING Hound too. I have just found out that I'm also called a LONG DOG. I am very Looong when I Stretch. I'm also a SKINNY DOG.

Perhaps I'm Skinny because my Person is STARVING me. She picks up my Food Bowl when I walk away from it before I've eaten my Food. I walk away from my Bowl and see if I can get back to it just in time before Person picks it up and takes it away.

I know Person's Games! They all started when she went on that Course on Understanding Dogs.

Person now always Eats Food First herself before putting our Bowls down because she's pretending to be the Alpha Wolf and because Alpha Wolves always Eat Food First. They don't eat Biscuits, though. Alpha Wolves eat Raw Elk Flesh.

But she can't MAKE me Watch her Eating Food First, can she! She Ignores me so I will Ignore her too. Perhaps I might watch Person if she ate Raw Elk Flesh first and not just a Biscuit.

Afterwards I try to tell Person I'm so SKINNY I will STARVE if she doesn't give me my food back, but she doesn't LISTEN to me. And she's supposed to be a Dog Listener now.

Anyway, today Person put a little Milk on my Breakfast and I love Milk. Milk makes Marmite sick. If Person puts Milk on my Breakfast I might just pretend to Play her Games. If she gave me Raw Elk Flesh I would certainly Play her Games.

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