Tuesday, October 31, 2006

Ghost Train

She-Person's Third-Born is called Paul. I've not told you about Paul yet because Paul is NOT FOND of Dogs. He's not even FOND of me! I like Paul though. I don't Bite him. I never Bite Persons. Nor does Monty the Mont and nor does Marmite.

We are all FOND of Persons.

Paul is Very Clever. He is an IT Consultant. My Person says IT is INFORMATION Technology.

I receive INFORMATION by SNIFFING, and I leave INFORMATION for other Dogs so they can SNIFF about me. When I leave INFORMATION in the field, Monty the Mont leaves some INFORMATION in the same place, and so does Marmite. We all leave lots of INFORMATION when we are out on a Walk or a Run in the Big Field.

I can do INFORMATION without Technology. So can Monty the Mont and so can Marmite. Perhaps INFORMATION is what Person will be finding out on her Canine Communication Course.

We live in an Old Train Station. A long time ago Trains used to Stop OUTSIDE. Persons got On and Off Trains. I know what Trains are because, sometimes, on a Dark and Windy Night a GHOST TRAIN passes through. It leaves INFORMATION. It leaves a Sooty smell behind.


Sunday, October 29, 2006

Muntjack Deer

Sue-Person-Next-Door says it's the RUTTING Season for Deers. Sue-Person knows ALL about Nature. She knows ALL about Birds especially.

My Person found out that He-Muntjack Deers do a single loud BARK. She-Muntjacks and kids usually Squeak. They all SCREAM when Alarmed.

So I think it was an ALARMED Muntjack Deer we heard SCREAMING the other Night. Either that or a SCREECH Owl.

Here is a pictue of a She-Muntjack Deer. I look a bit like a Muntjack and I have long thin legs too. I have a long tail though. Who cuts off the Muntjack Deers' Tails, I wonder? I wouldn't have thought they worried about low tables with drinks on.


Rosalie-Person-from-Wales came with Graham-Person to Eat Talk Drink Talk Eat Drink yesterday evening. We stayed OUTSIDE. We were Very Good Dogs. I never cried to Come IN. Marmite never made her funny little noise to Come IN. Monty the Mont never did his high Yap to Come IN. This is because Person gave us each a BIG BONE to Keep us Quiet. We Kept Quiet for FOUR hours.

This Morning we had to wait a Long Time before we could get our BONES again. We had to stay in Bed. We got up LATE. Breakfast was LATE. Persons got up LATE. Today is a LONGER Day than other Days are.

This is because The CLOCKS WENT BACK. Where The Clocks Went Back TO I don't know.

They must need that Extra Hour to get all those CLOCKS BACK. Our Clocks haven't GONE BACK anywhere yet.

Life is CONFUSING sometimes.

Saturday, October 28, 2006


Yesterday a CORGI Man went next door to see Neighbours-from-Heaven because they smelt Gas. His CORGI must be a SNIFFER DOG. Perhaps Corgis have their tails cut off so that they don't knock things off low tables when they are Sniffing for Gas. They would be very Low tables because Corgis have very Short Legs.

I'm a SIGHT HOUND but I'm also a very good SCENT HOUND. I could be a good SNIFFER DOG and Sniff Out Gas. Perhaps they didn't ask me to SNIFF OUT their Gas because of my long TAIL. I have Long legs.

This picture is OUTSIDE. Our field is out the back through the gate.

In the Middle of the Night I heard a SPOOKY NOISE coming from the farmer's field. I BARKED Very Loudly and so did Monty the Mont. We BARKED for a long time.

Marmite BARKED for a little while then she went back to bed and left it to us.

We didn't know what the SPOOKY NOISE was. Person tried to tell us it was only a little Muntjack Deer calling another little Muntjack Deer, but we didn't believe her. I couldn't stop BARKING. Neither could Monty the Mont.

Muntjack Deers are also called BARKING Deers. It didn't sound at all like BARKING to me. It sounded like a SCREEEEEAM.


Friday, October 27, 2006


Marmite was OUTSIDE for a long time by Herself.

She had found the Grapes and she had eaten all the ones on the ground. She couldn't Reach the Grapes that hadn't dropped on the ground because her Legs are too Short.

Monty the Mont could Reach the Grapes because he is taller. He likes Grapes too.

I don't like Grapes. But I can reach HIGHER. I can pull off twigs with Grapes and drop them on the ground for Marmite and Monty the Mont.


(Perhaps when Person has done her Canine Communication Course she will UNDERSTAND that it's NATURAL for Dogs to pull bits off plants and trees. Like I did with the little Olive Tree yesterday).

At last Linsey-Trainer let us do STOPs at Person Training yesterday. I did STOP Perfectly. Marmite was OK but not as good as me. She doesn't wait for the COME because she knows there might be a Treat on the Bed where she has to STOP.

Monty the Mont didn't do STOP because he his still in the Bottom Class. He was a Very Very Good Dog last week doing everything off lead, but he was NOT a Very Good Dog yesterday. There were more other dogs in his Class and there was a new puppy. It made him Prance About and Not Concentrate.

Anyway, next week we are MOVING UP CLASSES. I shall go into the very TOP CLASS!

Monty the Mont and Marmite will go into the Middle Class together. But Monty keeps trying to go to talk to Marmite. When Marmite is in the same Class as me I IGNORE her. Marmite takes No Notice of Monty the Mont. Marmite takes No Notice of me. Marmite doesn't take much Notice of anything, really.

Will Minto come to the Top Class with me? Minto is a Very Good Dog at Training. Except when she's off lead when she comes to see me and she lies on her back. I love Minto. Person says she is Wanton.

Thursday, October 26, 2006

Flaming Marmite

I have been That BLOODY PIP again. While Person was doing Tea or Coffee with Sue-Person next door I pulled bits off the baby olive tree so now it has a cage around it. (He-Person calles Marmite That FLAMING MARMITE when she keeps asking to go OUT then IN then OUT then IN making her Grimbling noise to go out and little yaps to come back in. He-Person calls Monty the Mont MONTY. Not Bloody Monty or Flaming Monty. Monty is his favourite, you see).

Person is going on a Course very soon. It is called a Canine Communication Course and is run by someone called Jan Fennell who does DOG LISTENING. It's because I am really a WOLF and I must be UNDERSTOOD better. So must Marmite and so must Monty the Mont. I like the sound of that.

Person will then UNDERSTAND that I don't want to do DOWN sometimes. She will UNDERSTAND that Digging is GOOD.

We have Person Training today. We have been Practising at Home. We have had lots of Treats.

PS. I haven't told you about my Wound for a long time. My hair has nearly grown all around it but there is a SCAR left to see.

PS. Mary-Contrary-Person's Dog called Nellie the Collie who lives with Robin the Golden Labrador is still not very well. She had an Operation. She is a Very Old Dog.

Tuesday, October 24, 2006


When Person was doing Tea or Coffee at Sue-Person-Neighbour-From-Heaven's yesterday, we worked on a Big New HOLE. He-Person found it. That BLOODY PIP has been DIGGING again.

Our new HOLE is in the corner of our field, by the fence. On the other side of our fence is a Cycle Track. This is where Trains once used to go. Not only Persons on Cycles go on it. People RUN there (I love Running), and people who WALK as well - and LOTS of DOGS. We always BARK at the Dogs to let them know that this is OUR TERRITORY. Monty the Mont BARKS the most.

Here is a picture of me on the table, HIGH UP. I can SEE right down the Cycle Track from here. I can see Persons and DOGS. I am a SIGHT Hound.

We have tried to DIG OUT under the fence before. Persons don't always find our HOLES. Once we did DIG OUT. Marmite squeezed through the HOLE because she has short legs. She went for a Walk and Sniff down the Cycle Track by herself. I squeezed through the HOLE because I'm Skinny. I explored the Farmer's Field but thought I'd better not go away too far. Monty the Mont didn't GET OUT. He was too big for our HOLE.

Today Monty the Mont is LIMPING. He has a Sore Front Paw. I know how he got that sore Front Paw! DIGGING. (I haven't got a Sore Front Paw).

Person has covered our HOLE now and says she will put Concrete in it today. Person likes Concrete.

Monday, October 23, 2006

Training at Home and Treat

More Practice at Home. Person has GIVEN IN. She is now doing 'TREAT on a Bed' like the other dogs do. She takes me OUTSIDE by Myself to do this.


She then shuts me INSIDE and tries to get Marmite out by Herself. I don't like this because if anybody is going OUTSIDE I have to be there as well, IN FRONT.

Marmite finds it all very CONFUSING too. All she is thinking of is the Treat. She has to Start All Over Again. Monty the Mont doesn't find it CONFUSING. When he finishes his Prancing About he is a Very Good Dog at both AWAYs and STOPs.

We went for a RUN HUNT CHASE SNIFF in the Big Field yesterday. Person says we GUSH out of the car when we get there.

Across the Field I saw a HORSE with a Person sitting on it - I saw it first because I am a SIGHT Hound. Marmite came with me. My Persons called us back very LOUDLY but I nearly didn't COME. I wanted to say Hello to the Horse. She Person called PIP PIP PIP PIP PIP so I though I had better go back to her. She gave me lots of FUSS. Marmite saw me COME Back so she Came Back too - SLOWLY. Monty the Mont had already been with Persons. He had been checking that they were Still There so he didn't have to COME Back.

Marmite is making Person CROSS just now. She keeps asking to go OUTSIDE and then she makes her Funny Little Noise to come back INSIDE. Persons call Marmite's Funny Little Noise 'GRIMBLING'. Person has just shouted NO MORE at her so she has gone to her BED. Monty and I are playing quietly. If we make too much noise we will go OUTSIDE then we will want INSIDE and then person will have to get CROSS with us all.

Person has just shouted OUT at me and Monty the Mont. Marmite is OUTSIDE again.

Saturday, October 21, 2006

Person Training Classes

Here is Monty the Mont being a Good Dog at Person Training. That's Linsey-Trainer in the Middle.

This is the Bottom Class. I'm not in the Bottom Class because I go to the Middle Class with Marmite. We have passed our Bronze AND our Silver tests. Monty the Mont hasn't even passed Bronze yet.

Monty the Mont will have another go at the Bronze very soon. He will be a Good Boy with the other dogs this time and not be On the Defensive. Person says he will catch us up very soon because he is BEST at doing all the Things.

You can see Toby the Little Dog who thinks he's a Big Dog and Gina who is a German Shepherd and exactly the same age as me. You can see a little bit of Pippa who is a Rescue Dog like I am.

We will be Practising at Home again today. I will get Treats. I will be very CONFUSED.

Friday, October 20, 2006


Ruth is Person's Second Born. Ruth lives near San Francisco and she goes on lots of Hikes. I would LOVE HIKES. This is a picture of where she lives. She is on a HIKE and the little winding path in the distance is the way back to her home. She has HIKED all that way. I could Hunt, Run and Chase if I was there with Ruth. (Person doesn't HIKE - she WALKS).

Ruth's HIKE starts off on a trail called Big Dog. It leads up a Mountain. Ruth doesn't find it Hard to Breathe. She is very FIT. So is Sarah Bear. And so am I.

Person isn't FIT and nor is Marmite. Monty the Mont is quite FIT. I think we should all go on HIKES with Ruth. Person says we would have to go on a plane to get there which would mean being Shut in a Cage for a long long time. Just like at the Vet's when I did my Wound.

Both Sarah Bear and Ruth are sort of Artists. We have an Artist next door as well.

I think Person is going to have a rest from Training today. She is Going Out for Lunch with Mary who has Robin the Golden Labrador who had the Hip Operation like Sue-Person-Next-Door. Mary also has a Collie called Nellie. Nellie is very old. She has just had a Tummy Operation at my Vet's where I went with my Wound. I wonder whether Farah got her all Excited and gave her Treats?

Thursday, October 19, 2006


We did Practice of STOP this morning.

Will we be Good Dogs for Linsey-Trainer this afternoon?

Linsey CALLED OUR BLUFF. She didn't do STOPs at all! She did AWAYs instead. We had to go AWAY instead of COME. We then had to go DOWN instead of STOP.

Nearly all the other dogs were better than me and Marmite. Especially Minto (I love Minto) and Harry who does Everything Perfectly. Bella and Toby who are Jack Russells were Very Good too even though they don't like DOWN much (neither do I).

Marmite was Very SLOW and kept sniffing bits on the floor. I pretended I had forgotten what DOWN means. I was a Good Dog though when Linsey passed Person a Smelly Bacon Chew right in front of my nose and I had to LEAVE IT. (Person tasted it and said it was too salty).

Monty the Mont was a Very Very Good Dog. There were only three dogs in his class this week so he wasn't On the Defensive at all. He did nearly everything without his lead and he walked nicely to HEEL. Person was Very VERY Pleased with Monty.

I think I might have been better without Practice. And Marmite.

We went to the Seaside in the Summer. Here is a picture.

Wednesday, October 18, 2006

Sarah Bear

Sarah-Bear is Person's daughter and she is the First Born. She has just come back from Walking the Inca Trail. It wasn't like WALKS that I go on. It was Mountains and Ruins. She says it was So High Up that it was Hard to Breathe and one Person had Altitude Sickness and had to go home.

I would like a WALK on the Inca Trail. I wouldn't get Altitude Sickness and my Wound is nearly gone now.

I like being High Up. If I stand on the bench at the end of our garden I am High Up. I don't find it Hard to Breathe. I can look out over the fields. I can see a LONG WAY because I am a SIGHT HOUND. There is a Pheasant in the Far Field but I can't get out to chase it.

Person's Second Born is Ruth. Ruth does a lot of Walking too - she calls it Hiking. Person doesn't seem to do Hiking. I shall tell you about Ruth soon.

Tuesday, October 17, 2006

This and That

I wonder whether David Blunkett might like to borrow Monty the Mont if Sadie wants a rest? Sadie walks a little IN FRONT to Lead David Blunkett to stop him bumping into things. Monty the Mont might Lead him into a Lamp Post or a Tree. Sometimes Monty the Mont PULLS. And he likes to have a SNIFF. If Monty the Mont meets another Dog he might Go On the Defensive. David Blunkett might not know what to do then.

Here is a picture of me Eating my Tea yesterday. Very Very SLOWLY. I always eat Very Very Slowly when Monty the Mont is watching me.

Persons have been Practising STOP at Home.

She-Person's PLAN-A didn't work. She called COME and when she shouted STOP He-Person Jumped Out and grabbed me and made me SIT. I didn't like that! I just didn't COME at all any more. Neither did Marmite or Monty the Mont.

This is She-Person's PLAN-B. She gives us lots of WAIT COME STOP SIT WAIT COME STOP COME STOP SIT by herself...and she is giving us TREATS. It is still Very CONFUSING but I don't mind because I get a TREAT. Marmite is the best at STOP. This is because she is always SLOW anyway. She likes STOP and SIT and especially she likes the TREAT.

When Monty the Mont has finished his Prancing About and Getting Excited he is then a Good Dog because he does WAIT COME STOP SIT nicely for the TREAT.

I hope I get Very Good at WAIT COME STOP SIT WAIT COME STOP SIT by Thursday so that Linsey-Trainer says I'm a Good and Clever Dog.

Person says I still have to learn to STOP SOONER. Person says I still have to learn to STOP without TREATS.


Monday, October 16, 2006

David Blunkett's Black Labrador

I heard Persons talking when Neighbours came to Dinner. They were saying that some She-Persons are ALL Covered Up when they go Out - with just a tiny hole to see out of. Nobody can see who is UNDERNEATH so they all look the SAME. (When I go Out for Walks I want all the Persons and Dogs to SEE me so I can say HELLO. I need to be able to Run, Sniff, Chase, Drink and Hunt).

A man called David Blunkett has written a book. He Can't See because he's Blind. David Blunkett has a black Labrador that looks like Monty the Mont (and who looks much the SAME as other black Labradors). She's a Bitch and her name is Sadie and she is a Guide Dog who stops David Blunkett who Can't See from bumping into things. Sadie could tell Who's UNDERNEATH Persons who are ALL covered in Black because she can USE HER NOSE.

She-Persons who are ALL Covered are the SAME as She-Persons who are NOT COVERED At All to David Blunkett - because he can't see anyway!

I am a SIGHT HOUND but I'm also a very good SCENT HOUND. Dogs like me could find out WHO is UNDERNEATH Persons who are ALL covered in Black. I would USE MY NOSE.

I hope Dog-Bitches won't have to go OUT for Walks ALL Covered Up with just Eyes and Feet showing. Marmite wouldn't like that.

Sunday, October 15, 2006

Very Good Dogs

What GOOD DOGS we were when Neighbours-From-Heaven Came to Dinner!

We stayed OUTSIDE. We played in the field a bit. We lay in our Big Outside Kennel for a bit. We lay down outside the door for a bit. I did Try to ask to Come IN, using the sad little noise that usually works. It didn't work this time though. Monty the Mont gave just two of his little short high barks that usually get him IN but that didn't work either. Marmite couldn't be bothered. She quite likes lying down outside listening to the Night Noises. If the black and white Cat had come into our garden it would have had a Surprise to find us out there.

So, we were quiet. He-Person took a risk. He left his shoes outside but I didn't take them into the Field to Chew. (She-Person thinks she will find out something naughty that I did later).

Her PLAN for us to LEAVE Neighbour-People and not to jump all around them worked. When Persons had finished all their Eating (they were still Talking and Drinking though) they let us INSIDE and we went straight to our beds under her desk and they put the cage around us. We were very quiet and very good. Usually Sue-Person and Artist give us Cuddles when they come to our house, but that was before Sue-Person's Operation. Monty-the-Mont had Cuddles after his Operation. I had Cuddles after my Operation. I had Cuddles when I did my Wound. Marmite had an Operation too and she also had Cuddles.

Anyway, I made two of my little quiet sad noises but nobody took any notice of me.

Saturday, October 14, 2006

Neighbours-From-Heaven are Coming to Dinner

Neighbours-From-Heaven are Coming to Dinner this evening.

It's not Coming to Dinner really. It should be called Coming to TALK and DRINK. They have One Dinner, then Another Dinner, and then Another and then sometimes Another. They have to WAIT a long time for their Dinners so they TALK and DRINK a lot. When I get my Dinner I WOLF it down as QUICKLY as I can (unless Monty the Mont is standing over me and I then eat Very Slowly). I don't Talk.

When Other Persons Come to Dinner I am Shut OUTSIDE with Monty the Mont and Marmite. Only when all the Dinners are finished and Persons just TALK and DRINK but don't EAT any more are we allowed INSIDE.

This time is different because Sue has had her Hip Operation (just like Robin did who is Person's friend Mary's Labrador). So Person has a Plan. She is going to make a CAGE. The Cage isn't for Sue-Person though. It's for Me, Marmite and Monty the Mont. When she lets us INSIDE, Person will shout BED at us and then she will put up the Cage around us. Anyway, that is her PLAN. Person's Plan's don't always work. (Her Plan to make me and Marmite STOP at Training didn't work did it. She has a new Plan for that now).

It is Hannawannah's Birthday today. She is She-Person's Daughter and she's Twenty-Four years old. That's about Three-and-a Half in Dog Years so she a little bit older than Monty the Mont.

Here is Hannawannah with Marmite when she was a puppy, and with Monty the Mont. You can see it was before Monty had the Operation. I had that same Operation as well (and then I had my Wound), but when this picture was taken I wasn't even born.

Friday, October 13, 2006

More Practice at Home needed

Well, I was NOT a Very Good Dog at Person Training yesterday. I did lots of things wrong. I got up and walked about when I was told DOWN and STAY. When I was told DOWN I didn't feel like going DOWN so I had to be Pushed DOWN.

When Person shouted STOP I didn't stop. I didn't even STOP properly when Linsey-Trainer did it and she called COME to me. I was COMING like she said, and then she stepped forward, put her hand right up in the air and VERY LOUDLY shouted STOP.

I decided to go back to She-Person instead.

So, more Practice at Home. (Persons have a PLAN).

Only one Dog did STOP properly and with NO Treats! That was Minto. Her Person is called Charles. He used a WHISTLE. I love Minto.

Even Harry who does Everything Perfectly doesn't do STOP properly. Harry's Person shouted really LOUDLY at him (just like my Person and Linsey did). I think a WHISTLE sounds much nicer than She-Persons SHOUTING.

Toby and Bella are Jack Russells. They STOPPED OK but they had a 'Treat on a Bed' to STOP for. The other dogs had a 'Treat on a Bed' and they stopped too. A Treat is More Important than COME. I would STOP for a 'Treat on a Bed'.

Anyway, I only PRETEND I don't Understand how to COME and STOP. Persons then try all funny different things to try to make me STOP and I get lots of attention. They may just have to use the 'Treat on a Bed' in the end.

Both Persons tried to make Marmite STOP but she just wasn't interested. Person says we were better before she did all that Practice at Home.

Anyway, Monty the Mont WAS a Very Good Dog. He did a FIND IT with a Toy and Brought it Back and GAVE IT to Person. He was even Very Good with the little dog who thinks he's a Big Dog. His name is Toby too and here he is:

Wednesday, October 11, 2006

Missing Bowl

When my Person went to fetch our bowls this morning to give us our Breakfast she could only find Two. My bowl was there and so was Monty the Mont's but she just couldn't find Marmite's anywhere.

When something is MISSING she always goes to look in the field. And there it was.

I always get the blame for everything but this time Person thinks perhaps it WASN'T ME. Was it MARMITE? It happened after Tea yesterday while Person was doing Tea or Coffee with Sue-Next-Door.

Person took this photo of the BROKEN BOWL. Marmite kept trying to pick bits of it up. Monty stood back and I kept well out of the way. That's why Person thinks it MIGHT have been Marmite's fault this time.

Anyway, there is a spare metal bowl we once used for Water. Marmite won't be able to break that. (Neither will I).

Tuesday, October 10, 2006


We had a friend from Training called Emma who has gone to live in Ireland and she's a Boxer. She doesn't have a Tail. I think it was Cut Off when she was a puppy. I'm glad I didn't have my Tail Cut Off when I was a puppy. I can wag it in all sorts of different ways - just a little bit at the end when I'm not sure of something or I can wag all my body as well when I bring a toy to Persons and I want them to play with me. I wag it rather slowly when I've done something naughty and I think they are going to be CROSS. Like when I took my bed into the field the other day.

I have a long curly Tail with a little twist of hair on the end. It's so long it can touch the floor when I make it straight. Monty the Mont's Tail droops a bit but Marmite wags her Tail all the time. She has a shortish Tail and it's usually sticks straight up.

For some reason when I walk past a low table with drinks on it Persons shout TAIL. LOUDLY.

A Tail is just another thing to have THINK ABOUT all the time. Perhaps some dogs have their Tails cut off when they are puppies to give them less to THINK ABOUT. Perhaps it makes them better at Training if they don't have to THINK ABOUT Tails as well as everything else. But dogs at Training like Emma and a Wiemerana whose name I don't know, they aren't better at Training then me and I have a long Tail.

Artist next door took a picture of Marmite chasing the tractor the other side of our fence. You can see her straight tail.

Anyway, Persons don't have Tails to THINK ABOUT. They sometimes THINK ABOUT mine (and Monty the Mont's and Marmite's). Especially when we are near the low table with drinks on it.

Sunday, October 08, 2006

Foam Blowing in the Wind

Not much Happened yesterday. Marmite and Monty the Mont didn't want to play much.

So while Person was doing Tea or Coffee with Sue-Person next door, I dragged my kennel bed into the field and took lots of foam stuff out of it. It was fun but Person wasn't pleased when she found all the bits of foam blowing around the field this morning. She's never really Cross unless she Catches me In The Act so I knew I would be OK. He-Person is different. He will be very CROSS when he sees it and say IT'S THAT BLOODY PIP AGAIN.

Because He-Person gets VERY CROSS when I take the stuffing out of things and it blows all over the field, She-Person often quickly Clears it Away. She hasn't Cleared it Away this time.

We are still practising STOP and we're getting really good at it. Except for Monty the Mont because he doesn't just STOP, he drops straight down onto the floor too. Person can't make him just STOP and FREEZE - yet.

Person took a photo of the back of our house. Here it is.

Saturday, October 07, 2006

Practising at Home

Yesterday Linsey-Trainer-Person said Practise at Home.

So Person is doing Practice at Home.

We will be walking towards her and for no reason at all she shouts STOP. We are so surprised that we just stand still. Perhaps that is what STOP means - FREEZE. Anyway, this isn't confusing because she doesn't say COME before she says STOP like she did at Person Training. I don't understand how I can COME and STOP at the same time.

When Person shouts STOP Monty the Mont goes straight Down to the floor and Marmite and I just Stand to see What Happens Next. Last time Person then said SIT so we Sat (Monty the Mont didn't Sit. He was Lying Down already).

Here we are waiting for tea time. When we follow Person in with our bowls I know she will suddenly turn around and shout STOP. Monty the Mont will Drop to the floor. Marmite and I will Stand and see What Happens Next.

Anyway, we will get our tea in the end.

Friday, October 06, 2006

I was a Quite Good Dog at Training

Well, I was a Quite Good Dog at Training. I saw all my friends and had a quick kiss with Minto whenever she walked past me.

Linsey-Trainer-Person was Very Interested in my Wound. Poor Linsey was sick when she came back from holiday. When I'm sick Person chases me OUTSIDE.

Monty the Mont is in the Bottom Class until he passes his Bronze Good Citizen Test. Today Monty the Mont was a Very Good Dog (for Monty). She-Person Handler only had to use her Bottle With Stones once, at the very beginning. This is because of a very noisy Staffie who jumps about and makes a lot of noise which gets Monty all excited, and a very little dog called Toby who thinks he's a very big dog and he EYEBALLS Monty the Mont looking right In his Eyes. Monty was On the Defensive just for a moment.

Marmite and I are in the Middle Class because we have passed both our Bronze and Silver Tests. I don't EYEBALL other dogs and neither does Marmite.

We are learning to do a very confusing thing. She-Person Handler says SIT and WAIT. She walks away. Then she turns to me and says COME so I start to Come and she SUDDENLY Shouts STOP. But I have been told to COME. Person gets CROSS when she says COME and I Don't Come. We try again. This time she shouts STOP so I think this time I will try something else. So I SIT instead. I am then a Very Good Dog and I get a treat.

So, does COME mean Come, or does COME only sometimes mean Come. Does COME sometimes mean SIT? Linsey says we must Practise at Home.

Marmite was a Quite Good Dog too but she kept Coming when He-Person Handler shouted STOP. She did Stop the next time, but that was only to have a Sniff. She likes to sniff the floor for treats other dogs have dropped while she walks round the room (I found a bit of cheese yesterday). Marmite loves all the other dogs and they love her.

Here I am asleep on Person's legs. It has been a Busy Day.

Thursday, October 05, 2006

Run Sniff Chase Hunt

Yesterday Persons took us in the car to the Big Field. This is our first Run Sniff Chase Hunt since I did my Wound.

First we always run off as quickly as we can to sniff where the rabbits live. I always get there first, followed by Monty the Mont and then Marmite who has short legs.

Monty the Mont is always WORRIED. He wants to be with Us and he also wants to be with Persons. Because Persons get left behind he can't be with us all so he runs backwards and forwards all the time.

Persons don't do Running Chasing and Rabbits. They just Walk. (Persons are doing sniffing just now, but it isn't proper Sniffing).

I always have to be in front. When Marmite goes off by herself I get in front of her and try to stop her but she takes no notice of me. She runs along with her nose on the ground and all you can see is her tail. She doesn't look where she's going at all.

I'm a SIGHT HOUND so I do look where I'm going. I'm so fast I can run all over the place Exploring in the Woods at the edge of the field, and I still get back to the Front. I can also LEAP over things and LEAP through the long grass. Monty the Mont can't Leap as high as I can. Marmite can't Leap at all.

Monty can run quite fast. He follows me mostly - when he's not WORRIED and running back to check up that Persons are still there. Here is a picture of Monty the Mont looking WORRIED.

It's TRAINING today and I can show everyone my Wound (or where it was anyway). Shall I be a Very Good Dog do you think? Is Marmite going to be SLOW or VERY SLOW? Is Monty the Mont going to be On The Defensive and will Person have to shake the Bottle With Stones at him, I wonder.

Wednesday, October 04, 2006

Person Training Tomorrow

It's Person Training tomorrow (DOG Training ha ha). I can't wait. All the Dogs and the Persons will still be able to see where my Wound was. They call Persons HANDLERS at Training.

Marmite has found a new way of being annoying this morning.

She asked to go OUT. Person let her OUT and of course I was quickly there and OUT in front of her. Monty the Mont was asleep under Person's desk as usual. Then Marmite asked to come back IN. Person opened the door and Marmite just sat there looking up at her (I come IN). First time Marmite did this Person bent down and said "Come On In Little Brown Dog". Marmite liked that.

She asked to go OUT again and then made her funny noise she makes when she wants to come IN. This time she just Sat There. This time Person Shut the Door.

Next time Marmite made her funny noise and the door was opened she came IN straight away!

This is what Marmite looks like when she is being STUBBORN.

Monty the Mont just stayed asleep under Person's desk.

Tuesday, October 03, 2006


I did some more Digging while my Person was doing Tea or Coffee next door and it made me tired. Persons get CROSS when they see my HOLES. Because it makes them CROSS I make sure they aren't there while I'm doing my Digging.

Sometimes Monty the Mont helps me and sometimes Marmite does. We like to work on the same HOLE together. We all Love HOLES. There is always something to find in a new HOLE.

I like Digging up stones and other bits. We make lots of HOLES all over our field, but Persons keep filling them in. HOLES make He-Person VERY CROSS when he's riding on the mower cutting the grass. That BLOODY PIP's been Digging again.

I used to like Digging the HOLES that Persons had filled in Out Again. But She-Person had an idea that stopped us Digging them Out Again. When Persons now do the Turdling they put our mess in the HOLES with earth on top. I don't like these HOLES any more.

We have a lot of Molehills all along the bank and Molehills make Persons CROSS too. Persons now use these Molehills to fill up our HOLES on top of the mess.

Anyway, I know I am doing a Very Useful Thing really by giving Persons somewhere to put our Mess and somewhere to put the Molehills. And He-Person then doesn't have to keep getting off his Mower when he's riding around the field cutting grass.

Sunday, October 01, 2006


Today the Doorbell Rang.


My Person managed to put our new No Jumping Up Collars on. (Collars usually mean we were going OUT - maybe for a Run and Sniff and a Hunt in the Big Field). Then my Person took our Collars OFF again. It was Welsh-Person-from-Chalton who had rung the Doorbell but she didn't come in.

Today I stood out in the Thunder and Lightening but I went indoors when it rained too much. There has been lots of RAIN. Marmite likes rain. She likes Water. I don't mind it but Monty the Mont doesn't like it. Here is a picture of Marmite when she had been out in the rain. She was a puppy then.

My Person doesn't take us for Walks beside the River much. This is because Marmite always jumps straight in and sometimes she can't get out again.

Granny-Person came today, but she didn't come to see me. I LEAVE Granny-Person ALONE. (If Granny-Person had Four legs like we do instead of just Two it would be better). It's been a BORING week. I haven't been for a Run and a Hunt since I did my Wound.

I hope all the Persons and Dogs at Person Training next week can still see my Wound because they haven't seen it yet.